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Why me? GROWING APART MAYBE LOVE AND ATTENTION HAS BEEN MISSING AND CAN BE REVIVED? 1. Some spouses work really hard to support the other spouse and children, forgetting that the spouse needs attention in the relationship. Money alone won't buy happiness in a relationship. You have to spend QUALITY time with your spouse. Before you come to see us, try marriage counseling if you think there is any hope of saving your marriage. Try setting up a date night. Spend the money on a babysitter and a meal, or eventually an attorney. You are still the same people, try to find the things that you fell in love with so long ago. Never forget special dates. A phone call to say, "I love you," a breakfast in bed, taking your spouse out to lunch, picking wild flowers, mailing a card, and other little things can work wonders. If there is no saving your marriage, you can get a divorce on the grounds of incompatibility. Sometimes spouses grow apart in interests, religious viewpoints, and even education. It's okay to be different, but you need to try to find some common ground to make it work if that is your true desire. Sometimes the other person is not going to be won over and divorce will happen whether you want it to or not. Since you are looking at this page, your problems are probably bigger than you can handle by yourself. We are happy to provide limited marriage counseling / analysis if you need this service, or to refer you for professional help along this line, if after a consultation with us, you determine this is the course of action you wish to take. FINANCES 2. Some spouses just don't have enough money to make the relationship work. Sometimes sound financial counseling with an attorney can help tremendously. Bankruptcy can solve problems and save your marriage. Bankruptcy is also an option before you divorce as opposed to trying to stick each other with all the debt in your divorce fight. ANOTHER LOVER 3. There is not a lot you can do if someone has found someone else, other than cut your losses by trying to decide how you want to divide assets, child custody and visitation before you come see us. ABUSE 4. You do not have to stay in a relationship where you are abused either physically or mentally. You are legally entitled to a divorce in this situation and you can obtain a divorce on other grounds as well. Children witnessing domestic violence are affected in many ways. There are shelters available and if you are being physically abused we urge you to contact us or your local police to find a shelter to move to immediately to get yourself and any children you may have out of the relationship.
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